Going Negative
I was talking recently to a group of teachers about Teacher Support Groups. I explained to them that, in TSGs, I’m not interested at all in positive teaching stories. What I want is the
bad stuff.
The stories that make teachers hate themselves or their students. The stories that make teachers think they’re terrible at their jobs. The stories that make them want to quit.
That is, I encourage teachers to go negative.
This led one of the teachers to mention toxic positivity, a topic she’s been exploring lately. She and I and others on the call worried that Teacher Culture can lean towards
toxic positivity.
Which is a very bad thing.
Why? Because denying negative emotions causes trouble down the road. Because positivity can be a particularly insidious form of denial.
Here’s the thing:
Negative emotions are negative, not bad.
In fact, negative emotions — emotions like anger, anxiety, fear, frustration, irritation, envy — are good. They provide incredibly accurate information about you and others.
Examining negative emotions can lead to
lasting relief
understanding
strengthened relationships
effective teaching
desirable learning
wisdom
In short, examining negative emotions is
transformative.
To be clear: I’m not talking about complaining or venting or obsessing on how people done you wrong.
I’m talking about examining emotions, doing emotion work.
I’m talking about doing something to turn a negative into a positive. Not a toxic positive but a reality-based positive. A positive that translates into an effective plan of action.
I promise you: Examining negative emotions will transform you and your teaching. Don’t believe me? Bring me a story. The worst you’ve got. Let’s see how your negative emotions can help you
attune.
This week’s mantra: I give myself permission to go negative and to do emotion work on the feelings. Just in case it works.
Note: If you’re really afraid of your negative emotions and suspect they’ll suck you into a hole, do not do emotion work alone. Rely on your therapist. Or contact me.